Home.

Toward the end of my recent European travels, I found myself too tired to blog.  I really wanted to capture in writing my reflections on my day of site-seeing in Istanbul, namely because it was a simultaneously lovely and bizarre experience.  I will take some time soon to write a post about that day - and my final thoughts on my trip - but not right now.

Right now, I simply want to share my thoughts on coming home.  Here's what I know:  I knew it was important that I go on this trip (in addition to being something I had to do for work), because it was an opportunity to stretch my perspective and learn about some new cultures I hadn't previously experienced (I've been to Europe a few times, but never to these places).  But, I was anxious to leave Anna.  I cried the day I left.  And, I thought numerous times about the responsibility that I have as a mother to be there for my child.  the realist in me knew that all would be fine, the week would fly by, and I'd find myself back at home wondering if the incredibly experience even happened at all. But, the super-freak in me thought about all the opportunities for things to go awry, leaving Anna without her mother.  Sounds silly, I know.

My point?  The gratitude I felt for the opportunity and experience didn't come close to matching that which I felt when I arrived home late Saturday night and hugged Brian and Anna.  Brian had a bottle of wine waiting for me (he knows me well) and was ready to hear "all about my trip."  I woke up Anna, and she grinned from ear to ear; I can see it as sweetly in my mind now as if it was just a minute ago.

I will always try to stretch myself and learn new things, if for no other reason than to become a better and more balanced mother for Anna.  But, at the end of the day, I belong here with B & Anna.  My life is far from perfect (for many reasons), but I've spent some time recently thinking about how the Universe (or God, or Mother Nature, you get my drift) knew what it was doing on that day in the Fall of 1995 when I met B for the first time.  It hasn't been a straight, smooth road, but the good ones never are.  That day led us both to this life we're living now, which is rich beyond what I could have ever asked for.

It's good to be home.